Wednesday, June 20, 2012

#anxietyprobs


So, my dad and sister are both on depression/anxiety medication.  I've always wondered if I inherited that trait, and if so...when would it decide to become evident in my personality & life?  During a recent fight the hubby and I were having, I said "Maybe I just need to get back on my medication!"  (I took anti-anxiety medication during wedding-planning).  His response was..."Maybe you do."  I'm not even going to go into a big long paragraph about how it feels to hear your husband tell you that you may need medication, haha, so we'll just skip right over that part.  I made an appointment with my regular doctor, not a therapist.  Mostly because my general care doctor knows me pretty well and treats me dad, so I could skip the full-on explanation with him.  I knew he would refer me to a specialist if he deemed it necessary.  

That appointment was yesterday.  

We discussed anxiety as an inherited issue.
We discussed anxiety as it negatively impacts my marriage.
We discussed the possibility of my anxiety only recently presenting itself in my life because I've self medicated myself with drugs & alcohol throughout high school, college, & beyond.
We discussed my fears about how taking medication might be me resulting back to drug-seeking behavior or using drugs to solve all my problems, take the easy way out, etc.
And obviously, we discussed all of my symptoms.   

He told us that there are three common misconceptions regarding depression or anxiety, none of which are true:
(1) Taking medication is a sign of weakness.
(2)  If my faith was stronger, I could give this to God and let Him heal me.
(3) I need to wake up tomorrow, make myself get over this, and no longer have this problem.

He compared depression and anxiety to diabetes.  Is taking insulin a sign of weakness?  Do diabetics have the luxury of praying their disease away and not taking insulin in the meantime?  Can diabetics wake up and decide they aren't diabetics anymore?  No.  He said the same applies to chemical imbalances - it's just a different chemical than insulin.  All of those things made me feel better and less embarrassed, and I think they may have helped my husband gain a better understanding.  

I'm taking the off-brand version of Zoloft.  I have another appointment in two months to evaluate the use of medication.  So....that's where we are on the whole anxiety issue.  Plenty of y'all have offered encouragement to me...and I deeply appreciate it.  :)  The anxiety isn't something I experience daily...so right now, I'm fine.  Most of the time, I'm fine.  Hopefully this medicine will keep me that way.  =)        

sig-1-1

11 comments:

Virginia said...

That's awesome! I hope the medication works out for you! Good luck!

Tamara @ T {times} Three said...

Yay! I'm so happy that you got some answers and some reassurance! I am wishing you the best!

Melissa said...

I'm glad you went to the doctor about it. Anxiety is a real disorder and a common one at that. I tried Zoloft during my senior year of high school but didn't like the feeling of being medicated. If medication doesn't work for you (although I hope it does) there are other things that help like yoga, meditation, running, cutting out sugars and caffeine, therapy, etc. I'm always here if you want to talk.

Ryan said...

Thinking about and praying for you, girly!

Holly said...

Wishing you all the best! :)

Stephanie said...

I've taken medication for anxiety since my mom passed away last August. I was that person that thought taking medicine meant I was crazy but I learned that's not true at all! Do I want to be dependent on medication to keep me sane during the days? No. Do I need it right now until I can learn different ways to cope with my anxiety and fears? Yes. It's SUPER encouraging to hear of other women going through this. It makes me feel...less crazy. Hahah! so thanks for sharing!

Meg @ Mr.C and Me said...

love! ... + that dr. sounds like a good one :)

Kristen Seuberling said...

I'm so glad that you are working with a Dr who takes the time to listen and discuss with you. I really hope that this helps you!

lilmoomoo said...

Glad you went to the doctor girl, there is NOTHING wrong with taking meds for something! :)

I also have had some anxiety issues in the past. It's not an all the time thing, but when it happens, it HAPPENS! haha

I hope you find a medicine that works for you!!

moo.

Karrie said...

My doctor said something almost identical! They do have a point! I hope your zoloft helps, I took the same for my anxiety, many different doses ranging from 25 mgs to 100 mgs. Hope you find your "magic number" and are feeling better soon! (I remember mine took about 3 weeks to feel a difference)

Knot Tied Down said...

I'm so glad you got some answers and are starting to feel better about all this! I know TONS of people with anxiety and sometimes even experience it myself. It's definitely nothing to feel embarrassed about.