So, my dad and sister are both on depression/anxiety medication. I've always wondered if I inherited that trait, and if so...when would it decide to become evident in my personality & life? During a recent fight the hubby and I were having, I said "Maybe I just need to get back on my medication!" (I took anti-anxiety medication during wedding-planning). His response was..."Maybe you do." I'm not even going to go into a big long paragraph about how it feels to hear your husband tell you that you may need medication, haha, so we'll just skip right over that part. I made an appointment with my regular doctor, not a therapist. Mostly because my general care doctor knows me pretty well and treats me dad, so I could skip the full-on explanation with him. I knew he would refer me to a specialist if he deemed it necessary.
That appointment was yesterday.
We discussed anxiety as an inherited issue.We discussed anxiety as it negatively impacts my marriage.We discussed the possibility of my anxiety only recently presenting itself in my life because I've self medicated myself with drugs & alcohol throughout high school, college, & beyond.We discussed my fears about how taking medication might be me resulting back to drug-seeking behavior or using drugs to solve all my problems, take the easy way out, etc.And obviously, we discussed all of my symptoms.
He told us that there are three common misconceptions regarding depression or anxiety, none of which are true:(1) Taking medication is a sign of weakness.(2) If my faith was stronger, I could give this to God and let Him heal me.(3) I need to wake up tomorrow, make myself get over this, and no longer have this problem.
He compared depression and anxiety to diabetes. Is taking insulin a sign of weakness? Do diabetics have the luxury of praying their disease away and not taking insulin in the meantime? Can diabetics wake up and decide they aren't diabetics anymore? No. He said the same applies to chemical imbalances - it's just a different chemical than insulin. All of those things made me feel better and less embarrassed, and I think they may have helped my husband gain a better understanding.
I'm taking the off-brand version of Zoloft. I have another appointment in two months to evaluate the use of medication. So....that's where we are on the whole anxiety issue. Plenty of y'all have offered encouragement to me...and I deeply appreciate it. :) The anxiety isn't something I experience daily...so right now, I'm fine. Most of the time, I'm fine. Hopefully this medicine will keep me that way. =)
